An artists rendering of what a "wired" communication device might look like, once services are operational.

In the Future the Human Voice Will Travel by "Wire"
by Patrick Kirk Gillock

Chesterville, WA - It was announced today the worlds largest telecommunication companies will begin research into a more inexpensive, reliable, and less hazardous form of broadcasting voice, Internet, and television. The research will mainly focus on wire or some other conductor of electricity.

Sound like Science Fiction? Well this news comes after years of failed attempts in wireless communications like cell phones, satellite TV, antenna reception, and cordless phones. "We as a society demand a reliable and higher quality signal, one that can only come across a copper wire." said spokesperson Betty Johnson of Wired for a Better World. "How much longer are we going to put up with this wireless crap?" was the general consensus on the street.

This news comes on the heels of local phone companies beginning to not offer wired services because of the hassle of installation. "Have you ever tried to wire a 4 bedroom home? It's not fun! But now all we have to do is give the family a cell phone and call it a day." said phone installer Bob Perkins of NWTelco. He concluded by saying, "Who cares about the reception quality and the possible brain tumors. Cell phone's are quicker and cheaper and that's good for everybody."

Officials believe that wired communications are five to ten years off.

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