John's Eastside apartment recently had new deadbolts and a $10k alarm installed.

Woman Wants Key to Boyfriend's Apartment
by Patrick Kirk Gillock

Chesterville, WA - An area man, John, was shocked today when his girlfriend of 6 months asked for a key to his apartment. "Why would Carol want a key to my place? What does she need to do in here when I'm not around? She's freaking me out!". He concluded by saying, "I mean, what if I were in here with a girl or something? Man, that would just be bad."

When asked why she would want a key to John's place, Carol responded, "This is exactly what I'm talking about! Why wouldn't he want me to have a key? Obviously it's because he has something to hide, right? He probably has a girl up there or something! What a jerk!"

John and Carol's relationship came to an end when he forgot their 7 month anniversary and was caught with a "girl up there". Thus proving John is not only a jerk but also an idiot.

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